Saturday, June 28, 2008

Long Rambling Post On Being "Too" Sensitive, Enlightenment, and Dr. Who

I'm sure a lot of us have been accused, at one point (at least) of being too sensitive. I was CONSTANTLY harped on by family members for it, and it drove me NUTS! Granted, there were many times when I took myself too seriously, but I was A teenage girl! And an actress! It's practically a law to take yourself too seriously under those conditions!
Anyway, it wasn't until I was in my early 30's that I came to realize that being sensitive isn't such a bad thing. That actually CARING about people, even people you don't know, can actually be *gasp* a GOOD thing!
I was reading an article this morning about a woman who, after years of practicing yoga and meditation, found herself facing anxiety about her boyfriend's proposal. So she decided to meditate even more, which made her even more sensitive. She didn't want to be that way. When she talked to a friend about it, he suggested she become a Bhodisattvha, which is a person who pledges to help others find enlightenment. This includes promising to love all people, including those she doesn't like. The point of her article was that, in some ways, it was harder to accept the marriage proposal than the idea of loving everyone AND taking on their pain. But she did it.
Anyway, the point I'm trying to get at, without getting too mystical, is that this woman, who was trying to "toughen up" and figure her life out, ended up becoming more sensitive than ever and, as she put it, "breaking [her] heart open" and then figuring her life out. And it allowed her to say "yes" to marriage and to sharing her life with another person. And to being compassionate.
I am far from finding enlightenment myself, but i do love the idea of opening your heart instead of closing it. And empathy instead of judgment. It's not always easy (understatement!), but I think it's worth the effort. For me, anyway.
My kids have taught me a lot about this. Because they're not "typical," and because they just accept people for who they are. They're so curious and friendly and loving. I think of the person I was and the life I had before I became a mom, and it just doesn't hold a candle to the present. I feel really blessed and honored to be their mom, and I try to remember that when they're driving me bonkers, lol!

So, on to something completely different. I was watching "Dr. Who" last night and Donna, the Doctor's traveling buddy, got sucked into a virtual world, which she thought was real. Then she met another woman from the real world who told her "This isn't your life. None of this is real. This isn't your real body." And Donna said "This isn't my body? I've been dieting!"
That just made me laugh.

4 comments:

Charlotte said...

Very interesting enlightenment article - do you have a link to it, perchance? I'd love to read it. I'd heard of that concept in yoga before but always figured it was one of those hippie relic things.

Thanks for the Dr. Who quote - totally giggled!

azusmom said...

I'm not able to link directly to it, but if you go to shambalasun.com, click on "current issues" and look under "features," it's called "My Vows."

Phew.

I REALLY need to learn how to link!

Crabby McSlacker said...

What a nice change to read about opening up--in a culture so overwhelming most of us try to close off for self-protection.

I don't think I'm brave enough to open my heart to everyone's suffering, but I sure admire those who do.

azusmom said...

Ditto!