Roller Coaster

Well.  It turns out PART of the reason for my recent emotional psychosis was hormones.  My period came 5 days early. And it came in with a wallop.
Then lasted 3 days, and was gone.
Weird.

Yesterday was a really good day. Helped along by the fact that I actually saw my therapist.  It was a terrific session, and I got a LOT out of it.
Today, however, is another day of sadness and worry.  I'm using the tools I have, and I think they're helping.  I need to remember that all of this doesn't mean I WON'T ever feel anxious and depressed, but it does mean I can move out of it sooner.

I'm trying to stay away from the 24-hour news cycle, but living with folks who have either CNN or (G-d help me) Fox on all day isn't helpful.  I have to bring my phone and ear pods downstairs when I make dinner, because the TV is right there, and if I have to listen to that crap, I will surely commit a criminal act.

I'm still going to get back on the meds.  I think I need them.  However, my GP has retired, so I need to find a new one.  Too bad I don't live in an area where there are literally thousands of health care professionals, as well as hundreds of hospitals.

Oh wait...    :)

One of the epiphanies I had (or, actually, was given to me) yesterday is that not only are my imaginary conversations with people who exist but whom I've never met not only NOT a sign that I've gone off the deep end and started swimming for Hawaii, they are actually HEALTHY!

Who knew?

I mean, besides my therapist, who could've told me that YEARS ago if only I'd let her in on the fact that I have those conversations.
All the time.
With many different people.
A number of whom just happen to be handsome, successful, talented men.

Coincidence, of course...

In good news, I lost another pound last week.  But probably gained it back with all the monthly cycle stuff going on.  Which is fine.  I'm trying to focus on how I feel.  And, physically at least, I feel pretty darn good. I'm trying to work it out so that maybe this summer my in-laws can watch the kids once a week, letting me get to yoga class.  It will save my sanity and, well, save my sanity.

So.  We'll see how it all goes.

As of right now, LG is on vacation.  He'll start summer school in a little over a week, but he is, I guess, officially an 8th grader.  He'll be 13 in a month and a day.
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

It seems like yesterday I'd just dropped him off for his first day of 6th grade!  How did this happen?!?!?!
OK, if I'm being truthful, It kinda feels like he just started preschool last week.

WG has one more week, then she starts summer school in July.
And she's going to turn 11 in November!

I'm not sure I can handle this.

Maybe I should get a prescription for Valium...