Friday, March 16, 2012

Rainy Days and Mondays

Feeling a bit down lately.  Can't really pinpoint any one thing, so I figured I'd blog it out and see what pops up.  So feel free to discontinue reading, lol!
Actually, Mondays don't bring me down: the kids are in school, I have the day off AND I have my yoga class on Mondays, so it's usually a pretty good day. But rainy days will do it, and we've had quite a few now, with no end in sight.
I can't really complain, as we'v had an unseasonable warm winter, and we really do need the rain. And I have to remind myself that I live in an area with a complete and utter lack of snow/slush/sleet/ice, so it's a pretty good deal.  And, oh yes, it's SAN FRANCISCO!!!!!!!!

But still, I've got the blues.

We have a car in mind, and the money is on its way.  I'll be glad when we have it in the garage and I don't have to deal with rental car agencies anymore, lol! I'm also looking forward to getting rid of our Stuff.  I'm hoping to have a bit more time to spend with Hubby in the next couple of weeks.  His birthday is Monday, and he's taking the day off.  We may actually be able to do something like go to lunch together, just the two of us!  What a concept!
Because I get, well, lonely.  My client was sick this morning, so I had the morning off.  Hubby was at work and the kids were at school.  Don't get me wrong, it was great!  But I also need to learn to be in my own company without automatically turning on the TV or heading to the fridge.  I went without both this morning, and I felt the loneliness.  And y'know what?  It didn't kill me!
Truth be told, I get lonely even when the kids are home.  Because we can't have conversations, and sometimes they don' want to play with Mom.  :(  
And I believe I've mentioned my lack of friends.
(Cue the violins).

I'm also realizing that I'm tired of being a neurotic mess.  It's exhausting!  After an unpleasant (though by no means harmful) conversation with the rental car company, I was WAAAAAAAY more upset than the situation warranted! I'm still SO terrified of making a mistake, of what other people think of me, and I just cannot exist that way anymore.
So I'm taking steps to remedy it.

Taking a moment to inhale. To look at situations from a different perspective, and not immediately believe myself when I jump to the Worst Possible Conclusion.  As Dr. Wayne Dyer says, "don't believe everything you think!"

So.  It's a rainy Friday afternoon.  The kids are home, the dog's been walked, Hubby has a performance tonight, and I don't have to be anywhere until tomorrow morning.  I'm going to take full advantage: get a quick workout in, play with the kids (if they'll let me), have a nice hot shower, watch "In Plain Sight," and go to bed.

Have a great weekend, and Happy St. Patrick's Day!


The Merry said...

Hey, you got us!

azusmom said...

Aw, thank you!!!!!!!! You're absolutely right!

Geosomin said...

Yes :) It's true. You do.

I think it's hard to find something to pour your interests into...something to make you go "ooh! cool!". Don't let it get to you too much. I find winter here to be that time for me...usually I go for a walk when things get to me and when it's freezing and blizzardy that just isn't an option. Right now I rotate between cherishing alone time and feeling like I should be doing something during it :)
I worry I'll go a bit nutty when I finish my thesis at first...