It's a beautiful day here in San Francisco. Tank top weather. And it's President's Day, which means that the entire family has the day off.
Hubby and I had grand plans for today: For the first time in a very long time, we piled ourselves and the kids into the car and drove into the city. Everything started out great: The kids were happy, we had a tank full of gas, and an easy ride on the freeway.
The we arrived, and WG didn't want to get out of the car. No problem, she does that sometimes, and, usually, if we're patient, she'll eventually decide she's ready and get out of her own accord.
Fine. Hubby stayed with her in the car while LG and I went to the park. Then we decided to come home, stopping by the grocery store on the way.
And while I was in the store, all Hades broke loose. WG had a full-on meltdown, and a violent one. She pulled her own hair, then started hitting her brother. When Hubby intervened, she grabbed his glasses and started smacking them against the car door, nearly breaking them. We went home, where she then screamed and cried for the next hour. And we were treated to some OH SO HELPFUL advice from the in-laws who, while probably well-meaning, really don't understand.
It's calm now: The in-laws have gone out, WG is quiet, LG is playing in his room, and Hubby has gone off to the gym.
While I sit here trying to process it, again.
Lately I've been feeling like a not-so-great mother. Like I can and should be doing more. Of course, with Hubby gone 17 hours a day, it's hard for me to corral both of them, or even to find things that they both want to do. Other than swimming. Which isn't always possible. And then something like this happens, and I feel like The Worst Mother In The World.
Logically, I know I'm not. But Mom Guilt is a strong force. And with kids who have special needs, it multiplies by about 8 zillion.
And right now, all I want to do is take a nap. But I can't. because the gods only know that the kids will get up to/into while I'm asleep. :)
In MUCH happier news, Hubby has been nominated for a Bay Area Theater Critics Circle Award! For the past show he was in. He's the ONLY one from the show who's nominated, which took some of the joy out of it for him.
But I couldn't be prouder.
And now, for the the first time in abut 13 years, I need to buy a dress.
I hope I remember how...
OK. Gonna go watch some "Gilmore Girls" and try to not think for a while.