I'm a Loser, Baby

I dropped my phone into the toilet yesterday.  It was running (the toilet, not the phone), so I was leaning over it to fix it.  And forgot I had my phone in the very shallow pocket of my hoodie.
I immediately placed it in uncooked rice, and left it there for 24 hours.  But the antenna is fried, and I need a new phone.
The thing is, it was  Nexus 5, which is no longer available.  I MAY be able to get a pre-owned one from  my carrier, but the one I had was from Google.  Which meant I got all the updates right away.  Even if I DO get one from T-Mobile, it'll take over a week, which means I am mobile phone-less for all that time. And any updates will take a month or two.
Or, I get the Nexus 6, which costs $300 more.
OR or, I get a similar phone, different model.

I just hate this.  I LOVED that phone!  Such a stupid, silly move, and now I have to spend (at least) $350 bucks to buy a phone I probably won't like as much.  I'm kicking myself for not simply TAKING MY PHONE OUT OF MY POCKET!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

It seems like lately things have been going haywire.  I know a lot of it is my perception, that the universe isn't really out to get me, and that it doesn't really have anything to do with the chain letter I deleted a week ago, but my brain isn't believing me.

I need an attitude adjustment, pronto!

Honestly, it kind of feels like this is a major crossroads, and it can be the point where either everything changes for the better, or I keep going down the same road, getting more and more frustrated.  So I think I'll choose the former.

But I'm also very nervous: I'm having simple surgery on Tuesday to remove a cyst from the corner of my eye.  It's been there for 5 years, and, as I said, should be quick and easy.  But,  a) It's my eye, and b) I'm Jewish.  We don't like sharp instruments near our eyes.  OK, and c) The way some things have been going, I'm worried something might go wrong.
There, I said it.
I put it out there.
Hopefully that'll diffuse it.

OK.
Enough.
Everything will be great.

Especially when I stop believing all the horrible things I currently believe about myself.  Honestly, if someone said HALF of those things to my friend, I'd kick them in the throat!
So way is it OK for me to say them about myself?

It's not.

And now, I''m exhausted.  Gotta go to bed.

Have a good week, everyone!

I'll keep you posted.