Monday, December 19, 2016

I'm trying to believe that everything is going to be OK.  But optimism has never been easy for me.  And I've been waking up every morning in a state of anxiety about what the next few months and years will bring.  I'm finding it nearly impossible to have hope.
It's hard to write about it, and I find I'm falling back into my old feelings of anxiety and sadness.  So I may need to take some time away from here and stew.  I'm sorry.
I'll pop in from time to time and let you know I'm still alive.  :)

Happy holidays, and here's hoping that 2017 is a good one!  Bless!

Friday, December 9, 2016

I Have Been Remiss

And I apologize.  I've tried a number of times to write, but have been processing everything and dealing with all sorts of stuff going on, so I ended up deleting those posts.

To be honest, I still don't know what to think about everything that's happening.  Part of me thinks, well, this is it.  The end of society and humanity as we know it.  Another part thinks it'll be a few years of wackiness, followed by (hopefully) the return of at least a semblance of sanity.  Yet ANOTHER part of me is more terrified than ever, especially for my kids.

I'm glad to live where we do. We will probably not be bearing the brunt of the insanity.  But I can't help but fear for the most vulnerable people in the country. And in other parts of the world.

And then I tell myself to take it in small doses.  Because otherwise I will make myself crazy.

So I focus on things closer to home.
Ah, home, where it sounds like a TB ward.  We've all had a cold over the past few days, so the six of us have been coughing and hacking and sneezing and sniffling.  Luckily it seems to be fairly mild.  I got it on Wednesday and was able to get to yoga today.

Last week I was able to try a free class at CorePower Yoga.  I decided to take the level one class.  They told me "You'll sweat a little bit, not too much."  An hour later, after swimming through a pool of my own perspiration, I was proud of myself for getting through it.
And then walked around in agony for the next three days.

I then decided that it isn't for me.  I'll stick with my regular classes.  (At studios that have free parking.  ;) )

WG is still doing well on her meds.  We're going to try a different mixture for LG, as this one is not working for him at all.  It's trial and error.  Hopefully we'll find the right percentages.

I've also been asking for a bit more help here and there.  My mother-in-law is willing and able to watch the kids, and we have respite hours available, so I need to take advantage.  It goes toward the whole keeping-myself-sane thing.
Also trying to figure out whether or not I can take my London trip next year.  I feel guilty spending the money, and the time away from my family, but I also want to make at least one more trip before they leave the E.U.  I must admit I've become somewhat addicted to the city, and to having those 4 days a year that are my own.  Sometimes I think I should go somewhere else, but London is my favorite place on this earth.  Plus, I'm pretty good at getting around now.  For someone with zero sense of direction, that's quite an accomplishment.  :)

Something else to ponder.

OK.  Gotta go blow my nose and lie down.  Who says I don't know how to spend a Friday night?!?!